It’s been a month since we lost our family dog to a cancerous tumor. After work I moved some of her things from the kitchen to the basement in hopes of donating them to someone who can use them later. I had to stop a little early though, because even after a month, I’m still choking up on the verge of tears. For almost 12 years, Shadow was a part of our family and I guess I’m still a little sad that she is no longer here.
It’s been two years since the biggest wake up call my life has seen. I’m still happy to be here for the most part, but I’ve come to the realization that some things are never going to be the same. Nevertheless, I’ve decided to continue my journey and see where it goes. Can’t complain too much. I don’t need any blue pills and my family is complete as it is. My cup runneth over and the carpet has stains that will never come out.
The thing I notice the most on a daily basis is the feeling in my right arm. I can move it and use it normally, but there are parts of it that will probably never have feeling again. I like to think of it as the arm that touched the other side. A daily reminder, sometimes a depressing one.
No one else can see. Maybe that’s why I write. Notes to myself mostly, that some future self can use to remember the me of now. A message in a bottle, addressed only to myself.