Mondays are generally pretty stressful for me no matter what. I just accept that now for the most part. Today I was mostly filled with a great sense of dread, as if fearing what was going to happen next. I think it really got started with a rather vivid dream I had last night.
In this dream, I found myself acting as a servant in the compound of a wealthy and powerful family. It was like Rong-guo House in The Dream of the Red Chamber, which I’ve been reading. The thing about though was that I really didn’t belong there. I was actually there trying to get someone else out, woman whose name don’t remember. At least that is the impression that I remember having. On my first attempt, I barely got into the main house and out before being caught. And a little later I received a summons to the house from one of the old and powerful family matrons.
Oddly enough, I missed my appointment with her because of a party. It was outside of the compound and the people lined up to get in were common folk. Unfortunately it filled up just before I could get in. So I rushed back to the compound for my appointment, but it was too late. The next thing I knew, I was acting as a servant helping serve meals and pretty much winging it the whole way. But no one seemed to notice or even care that I was just an outsider who had slipped in. I guess they really needed the workers.
Finally, there was a loud commotion. Someone in the family was very upset that there were all of these outsiders inside of the compound. He declared that they were going to purify the house. I took this to mean that outsiders like me were going to be killed, so I took that as my cue to leave. What surprised me at the end was the fact that a lot of people were hurrying to get out of there as well. Apparently the whole place was full of outsiders not related to the family by blood or formal relationship!
I never rescued the girl, and I don’t remember getting out of the compound either. But I did wake up with some pretty intense feelings, and perhaps that’s what colored my mood today. I like to joke that I’m Chinese by marriage, but clearly now I have some proof that my subconcious has been thoroughly influenced by my exposure to Chinese, Japanese, and Korean culture as I certainly didn’t gain such imagery from my midwestern upbringing! Maybe tonight I’ll dream the conclusion…